Gaslighting 101 - Pierce The Darkness contribution

Gas lighting is a form of brainwashing.

Simply put gas lighting is a form of brainwashing that is meant to make one doubt one’s own beliefs, thoughts, and perceptions. It is a method that narcissists employ with great success to control those close to them. Gas lighting however is somewhat difficult to execute successfully because it essentially demands that others change their basic core beliefs and replace them with those of the gas lighter. Most people vigorously defend their beliefs and become quite resistant unless properly conditioned beforehand. These techniques are not unlike those used by religious cults to brainwash new members.

Gas lighting therefore to be effective usually starts off gradually and grows slowly and incrementally over time as each new hurdle of resistance is in turn overcome. The gas lighter must be consistent and regular in reinforcing their message that you are wrong and they are right. In order to successfully gaslight someone a narcissist will carefully pick and then groom that target for some time before actually initiating the techniques needed to sway their intended target.

Gaslighting 101: Techniques revealed - Denial

There are a number of different methods used to gaslight someone. One important method is Denial, examples of Denial are:

"I never said that" , "You are imagining things", "You are always accusing me"

It is simple but effective. Don’t underestimate its power.

Gas lighting 101: Techniques revealed – Confiding supposed secrets

Another common technique employed is confiding what others supposedly think about the target. Imagine a girl meeting a group of friends to go out dancing and one friend who is jealous of the attention a particular friend usually get in such outings tells this person that some of the other girls think she ruins their chances meeting guys by saying stupid things. This plants a seed of doubt in the targets head that the gas lighter hopes will grow and multiply. In order to be effective it should be realistic and not too extreme…the idea is to plant a shred of doubt and let the target grow it internally into something bigger.

Gas lighting 101- Techniques Revealed – Disorientation

In this technique the gas lighter hopes to create a sense of disorientation that will make the target question their own memory. Examples of this are:

1. Switching around meeting times and appointments. 2. Meeting at a different location and then denying it was wrong. 3. Moving objects from one location to another.

Gas lighting 101- Techniques Revealed – Playing up your fears

In this technique the gas lighter simply hopes to awaken the targets own fears. Examples of this are:

1. “If I leave you will be homeless and broke.” 2. “You will never meet someone else.” 3. “You will lose everything.”

Gas lighting 101: Techniques Revealed – Questioning what you believe

Another method of gas lighting involves questioning the target. Examples of this are:

1. “Are you sure you want to do that?” 2. “Why are you doing it that way?” 3. “Wouldn't it be better if you did it this way instead?”