Criticism Is Unacceptable

When criticized, narcissists show themselves woefully incapable of retaining any emotional poise, or receptivity. And it really doesn't much matter whether the nature of that criticism is constructive or destructive. They just don't seem to be able to take criticism, period. At the same time, these disturbed individuals demonstrate an abnormally developed capacity to criticize others (as in, "dish it out" to them). It's precisely this need to be viewed as perfect, superlative, or infallible that makes them so hypersensitive to criticism. And their typical reaction to criticism, disagreement, challenges-or sometimes even the mere suggestion that they consider doing something differently-can lead to the "narcissistic rage" that is another of their trademarks. To protect their delicate ego in the face of such intensely felt danger, they're decidedly at risk for going ballistic against their perceived adversary.

All of which indicates just how fragile their artificially bloated sense of self really is. Given the enormity of their defenses, they regard themselves not on a par with, but above others. Yet they're mortally threatened when anyone dares question their words or behavior. Ancient fears about not being acceptable are never that far from the surface, which is why narcissists must forever be on their guard with anyone who might disbelieve or doubt them. For any external expression of doubt can tap into their own self-doubts.

And this is why, though they can certainly "dish it out" (by way of affirming to themselves their superiority over others), they just can't "take it" themselves. Obviously, if the child part of them was unequivocally convinced about their basic acceptability--was, that is, adequately integrated into their adult part--they wouldn't need to boast about (or exaggerate) their accomplishments, or vehemently debate anyone who took exception to their viewpoint. But it's definitely the case with narcissists that they see their best defense as mandating a good offense.

You cannot change another person, so stop trying to make the narcissist pay attention to you, hear you, respond to your feelings, understand your point of view, or be more thoughtful. This is an impossible task so it is time to give it up and concentrate on something that can be successful, that, is, doing these things for yourself.

Source.